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Abandoning Our Culture/lust

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#1 DayaJot Nirmal

    *New Member* - Welcome to DiscoverSikhi.com

  • 1 posts

Posted 07 February 2007 - 07:53 AM

From the following link -


Walking away from one's heritage......

today, I had a very stressful chat with a fellow 'so called' Punjabi (Please see the following link - http://profile.myspa...endid=53300315) . it was very upsetting. I will share it with you, without disclosing names. I will add that the person did have some good points, and yet, at the same time, some very wrong misconceptions. basically, he is a 'so called Punjabi' who has chosen to abandon his culture and date a girl (Please see this link -http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=63414890) with a different mindset and lack of values than what he has. instead of improving his culture, he's enjoying someone who will give him attention when she's playing mind games with him. will add commentary after the following: (In this case, he is Sikh, and she is a protestant who smokes and drinks, which is against Sikh religion and disrespectful to his religion.)

ď i think white ppl are much more honest

what do u know sweetie, u dont know what those girls are
i actually dont like that culture

i know there are many good girls, but you are too over board for me to make a point
if u listen to me
the culture is too shallow, they expect so much angel like behavior from guys that its almost impossible to approach a girl, only thing is if girl approaches you, girls dont do it, so its much easier from guys who are from outside to approach girls and these girls are shallow, they hate beard, they just want to have good time, ethics, spirituallity, is <admin-profanity filter activated> to them, so they do what they want, and <admin-profanity filter activated> guys are left to walk the dignified way of culture, other thing here is, sikhism and punjabi culture are totally different things and can exist without each other

a muslim can be punjabi, a hindu can be punjabi, culture is notthing, i have my pride in being a sikh

madam, will u kill your infant daughter

it happens in punjab

come on ground, what do u think those ppl want, everybody wants sex, gori say it, desi act something else, do something else, culture does not adds any virtue, yes if its a practicing sikh girl, then its different no they dont kill their kids, gori is not absolute term, there are americans, and there are europeans, and ppl varyĒ

now, before anyone thinks of me as horrible, or bad, stereotypical or desscrimanatory, i must say this...that is NOT my intention, and I will add that the person does have SOME good points. YET, he also has ALOT to learn.

First off, he is dating a gori girl. This is basically what the conversation is about. He had trouble in the past with a Punjabi girl, and has now decided to date a gori girl. first off......

For those of you who don't know.....the only thing separating desi and gori are two things - skin colour and mindset. Both are considered Caucasian according to wikipedia.


(The term Caucasian race or Caucasian is used to refer to people whose ancestry can be traced back to Europe, North Africa, West Asia, South Asia and parts of Central Asia. It was once considered a useful taxonomical categorization of human racial groups based on a presumed common geographic and/or linguistic origin.)

Now, the big difference is mindset. The thinking of the two cultures. So called ' white' people are no more honest than Punjabis, or desis in general. Or anyone else for that matter. (Often times, they are far LESS honest in fact.) And, whilst Punjab is not perfect, there is much to be said FOR it. Also, the actions of wanting guys (or people in general) to act like angels is far from a bad thing. however, It must be equal for both girls and guys, and must be realistic and for pure, good, constructive intentions. 'Gori/gora' males and females (in general) alike are very materialistic, set on ego, and live life to fulfill their own temptations. They are very false and misleading. this happens in all cultures, but particularly in the western cultures. and goris are incredibly shallow. the macho dominance in gori males, and the sex pot attitude of the gori girls is incredibly misleading. Also, on the news all too often many reports of some gori, Latino, and/or black girl who has gotten pregnant, dumped her baby in the toilet or a garbage can, or they sit in motels and have crystal meth labs, they have sex with multiple partners, and they don't have regrets. They do drugs, get drunk, have orgies, etc. and expose their children to it. With many goris, Latinos, and blacks also is the need to show off....wearing tiny clothes, flirting wildly with others, having public kissing sessions to show off, etc. the need for discipline is crucial to create a successful society, and to keep our humanity going. Lack of virtue and values leads to our demise, because we allow ourselves to cause trouble to us and others. Gori/gora, Latino, or Black does not mean a person is bad. However, these people are more known for their inappropriate behaviors.

On a few other notes, many goris also dislike face hair/ long hair. And goris also have just as much, if not less concern for their spirituality.... Or the have false ideas from it which contribute to some of society's evils. They gain false views on things, and then try to spread it forth, whilst still committing other acts, making them hypocrites. (For instance, the 3ho Sikhs - most visible by their white outfits, and go by various prefixes like Shri, Hari, Aum, etc; often with names such as Amrit, Snatam, etc. (Though is not ALWAYS a sign, as some true Sikhs also have names such as Amrit and Snatam. Look for other stereotypes and signs, especially as they will have limited association to Punjabi culture, some even saying it has no connection to Sikhi.) Which are what is called a cult - a religion or sect considered to be false, unorthodox, or extremist, with members often living outside of conventional society under the direction of a charismatic leader. Obsessive, especially faddish, devotion to or veneration for a person, principle, or thing. (Please see this link - http://www.cultnews.com/?cat=2 ). Also, many goris are fascinated by other cultures they're not used to, and if they find the person friendly, they may latch to them for attention, but not because their souls are truly bound to that person, despite what they may say. they are enamored by something they're not used to. and, yet, on the flipside, many goris also make fun of cultures they're not used to, and harass them. (please see my previous postings on this as examples.) This isn't meant to be gori/gora bashing, but merely pointing out the fact that goris/goras are often the most apt to harass desis (and other cultures), and in general, people of one culture (especially western vs. eastern) will try to take advantage of each other for false reasons (though it should be pointed out that not EVERYONE is like this, in general, it is more common. I have seen more women than men (especially gori women) who play the emotional toy game on a long term basis. (The men seem less successful at the game they play than the women.) They will flirt in public (or on publicly visible websites), tell the person they love them, say they are soul mates, they want to marry, that their families are getting ready for their wedding plans, etc. this is either most often lies, made very craftily so that the other person will be gullible enough to believe the one stating the aforementioned sweet talk, or they will make serious plans, at which point, when the victim reaches the goal (going to the other's country, marrying them, etc.) the result is the predator using the victim for money, sex, and their own egotistical gain. the person is like a drug to them, and like any drug, the drug must be taken away and the predator must be 'broken' of their habit before any good can come This relationship can last for many years without proper detection and intervention, and usually unknowingly harmful to the untrained eye as the predator has their plans plotted out with amazing precision and dedication. Sometimes, and often, if desperate enough, the predator will have a few victims with varying degrees of seriousness, and commonly at least person who they attach themselves to most seriously, especially if the person is easily led to believe they love them. these people become a pawn in a game of emotions, money, sex, and other assorted gains. Some things to look out for are public displays of affection(internet wise, referring to promises of marriage, calling each other jaan or other pet names, telling each other they love each other truly, love each other only, are soul mates, etc. especially after not knowing each other very long, and only having the internet and/or phone communication. Usually the people have never physically met, though physical meeting often does not improve the situation, and can make things much worse. Also look for pictures of one or both people (especially in their profiles) photo shopped to look like they are together, often in a romantic pose. Look for profile, blog, or other pics, where one or both people are modeling in seductive, suggestive poses, trying to emphasize their busts, rear ends, or anything that may be seducing enough. They will often promise and swear they respect the other person's religion, often claiming they are going to convert or have converted. In the case of Sikhi, one can easily tell a person is dishonest about their respect for the religion by their use of the above tactics - the flirting, the seductive pictures, often with body parts, little clothing, and/or cleavage showing, as modesty and focusing on the soul over the body are crucial. Similarly, the predator will also claim to respect victim's culture. Be especially aware of someone who will say the respect and love the culture - when asked, they will use stereotypes learn from their culture (like western stereotypes of India). Some really tricky types will take extra time to sound more convincing. Sometimes, the predator will say they do good things to make themselves look better. Or they will try to portray themselves in a convincingly attractive manner according to what the victim appreciates - often these are deliberate lies and/or exaggerations. Here is another example of a woman from Romania who is quite skillfully luring a Singh from India -




Also, if you have MySpace, look for Jay Lamba. (He's dating a Gori Muslim convert who is also a single mother, and shows her body off inappropriately in pictures.)

Please learn the difference between love and lust - LOVE is shown by first creating a mature bond with foundations from guiding, inspiring, and working to improve another person's life, without attachment of romantic or sexual feelings. We show we love another more truly when we work to make them better people, then when we sweet talk them and flirt. This, in fact, shows more disrespect, as these actions show seeking only attention and egotistical satisfaction from the person we say we love, and from others around us. this is very false, misleading, and is a form of exploitation. Similarly, Pornography (blue movies, xxx, movies, inappropriate pictures of people/animals/people and animals, and or other objects, used for a sexual nature) is lustful exploitation. It is also very false in what it represents. It is not intended for information purposes, and involves much false information, fantasy, and things derived only for lust. It does now show how to properly respect another person. Also, it is often abusive, either in the message it portrays, or in the creation of the piece itself. It is created by models and actors who do not love each other. Often times, violence, disease, drug and alcohol abuse, etc. are common, and almost part of the normal environment. Also, the actors/models usually are hiding emotional and or mental problems, and so turn to this as a form of temporary remedy for issues that only grow worse, sometimes leading to murder or suicide. Those who involve themselves in such activities are only promoting these horrid (and in some places, illegal) acts. PLEASE ALWAYS REMEMBER THAT THOUGH SEX IS NECESSARY PART OF LIFE, IT SHOULD NEVER HAVE PRIORITY BEFORE RESPECT FOR THE SOUL, GUDING, AND INSPIRING, AND DOING ALL YOU CAN TO PROVE THE LIVES OF OTHERS AND VIRTUES OF SOCIETY. For example - Bhagat Puran Singh is a much better person to follow than Brad Pitt, Leonardo Dicaprio, Angelina Jolie, etc.

Also, I will agree that one does not need to be Punjabi to be Sikh, nor does one need to be Sikh to be Punjabi...BUT there IS a connection between Sikhi and Punjab, as our faith originated there. and that in itself is a reason to appreciate Punjab, whether you are Sikh or not, because many Sikhs are still very good people, and do an awful lot to contribute to the best of society, especially many Punjabi Sikhs, and just because there are bad people in Punjab does not mean hate the culture. (equally so, same goes for the gori culture - it does not mean though goris are far from perfect to hate them right away, but it does not mean that you turn to them and abandon your own culture and say you hate it because you see faults in it. this is equally as wrong.) if you find fault in your culture.... Work to correct it. it's a challenge, and one that may seem near impossible, but only because there is not enough effort being put forth to make it possible. remember that there is no one bad or good culture itself, it's the stereotypes and lack of values and virtues that people of the culture have decided to follow. There are good and bad in all nations, but increasingly, much more bad than good, and we as collective society worldwide need to stop this and turn it around for the better of us all. (An additional note - what is written here is general common sense. There are references to Sikh/Sikhi/Sikhs, however this is not limited to Sikhs alone. This work was written by a Sikh so it is an example. It also is not intended to push any one personís ideas on others, or push any one religion in otherís faces. Also, nowhere is any one religion or type of people intentionally being seen as good or bad.)

So, to make a point.....if you don't like how your culture is, don't make a petty escape from it and say you don't like it - work to improve it. Our cultures are important to us as they are our history, and much can be learned from them. If we all abandoned our cultures because of things we didn't like, we'd all be in a right sorry state. Our cultures give us incredible information about many things - who were are, who we need to be, who we need to NOT be, as well as information on diseases and physical body differences. We need to keep our culture intact, and respect it, because just like us, no culture is fully perfect, but we must work to do the best for our cultures, and never forget who are, and where we came from. just as we need to improve our faiths, when they have imperfections. Please help your faith and culture by stopping people like this, and get them to realize what they're doing. PLEASE DO NOT MERELY IGNORE THESE SITUATIONS AND SAY THEY ARE NONE OF MY BUSINESS, I HAVE NO REASON TO DEAL WITH THEM. THEY EFFECT YOUR CULTURE, YOUR RELIGION, AND THOUGH MAYBE NOT YOURSELF DIRECTLY, IT EFFECTS ALL OF US INDIRECTLY, AND COULD EFFECT YOUR FRIENDS OR FAMILY, PERHAPS EVEN YOURSELF IN THE FUTURE. PLEASE LOOK OUT FOR ANOTHER PERSON AND TRY TO STOP AND PREVENT THESE ACTS SO THAT THE NUMBER OF THEM IS GREATLY REDUCED. IT IS YOUR JOB AS A RESPONSIBLE CITIZEN. YOU RESPECT YOUR FELLOW PEOPLE, YOUR CULTURE, YOUR RELIGION, THEN IT IS JUST AS MUCH YOUR RESPONSIBILTY AS IT IS THOSE INVOLVED IN THE SITUATION, BECAUSE THEY NEED OUTSIDE GUIDANCE TO CORRECT THEM AND STOP THE SITUATION. IF YOU TAKE THE INITIATIVE, AND WORK TO STOP THESE TERRIBLE THINGS, YOU ARE A VERY GREAT PERSON, AND A ROLE MODEL FOR YOUR COMMUNITY. THANK YOU.

Again, some of the following people to please get in contact with and deal with are mentioned elsewhere here, but are repeated here -


Please get in contact with these people, and work with them to get them to realize what they are doing is wrong. Help them find someone appropriate in their own countries, and help them build a healthy, realistic relationship with those people. Please start with the links listed here, as well as any others you know of. Thank You very much for your time and effort. Itís greatly appreciated and crucial for us all.

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